I love mankind … it’s people I can’t stand!!

Ok I’m actually generally feeling quite favourably towards people at the moment but there are a few things that have irked me this weekend.  On the top of my list is our cleaner (if she writes another note about omelettes 🍳 and watering 🚿 cans I’m going to move out), the rabbit 🐰 (I will come onto this) and people who seem incapable of using Google 💻 .  SERIOUSLY – you have a smart phone, probably an iPad, and sit at a computer all day long, which has internet.  Please do not ask me questions you can find out the answer to yourself – google really can help you –  it’s truly a wonder, please try it – this may help lmgtfy.com (thanks Emma 😊).

My first problem this weekend came in the form of a pack of Percy Pigs 🐷.  I love Percy Pigs 🐷🍭.  I mean I think basically everyone does.  But Percy Pigs are not allowed in my current none sugar eating life choice.  And I entirely blame Andy for what happened on Friday evening.  Andy had a marvellous party, and there I was enjoying myself, talking to lots of people 👧👦, and having a lovely time 🍸, when I spotted the pigs 🐷.  An unopened packet just sitting on the kitchen counter…. I couldn’t help but enquire as to the reason for the pigs (not a usual drinks party delicacy).  SOMEONE 👦⁉️ had brought them as a gift for Andy.  I don’t know who you are, but you are both wonderful, and presented me with a very very big test.  And you know what – I did so well, we eyed each other up 🐷👧 for a long long time, me and the pigs, and then somehow, they ended up open… and perhaps I may have consumed a Percy Pig or two, or three..

However, I am still not taking Tom’s advice and it’s important to learn from your mistakes.  So I am back to NO SUGAR🍚❌.

The second situation played out like this…  A tip off from Chesca led me into TK Maxx to try on a full length Matthew Williamsom pink and orange dress 👗💖.  It is the MOST WONDERFUL PINK 😍.  But the price tag was not so wonderful 🏧.  So I tried it on (it fits like a glove), tried to justify the price (I need a new dress for reeling 👗, such a good colour 💖, I will never find something like it again at the same price 😍), did a few swirls in the changing room (it swirls nicely), tried it on with some glittery heels 👠 (I could easily have it taken up..), changed my hair into different styles 💇(looks nice), thought about what jewellery I would wear with it 💍(some nice simple earrings) and finally, sadly, with much reluctance took it off and gave it back to the slightly bemused lady in the changing room 😔.  I didn’t buy it, and I really very much would have liked to have done, so at least I won one battle this weekend, even if I did accidentally gorge on Percy Pigs 😳🐷.

So after all these temptations, I did cycle 🚴 to the Tate Modern 🏭, which was v nice, and caught up with Charlie and Sophie and looked at some art 🎨 – we had a general wander.  I cycled 🚧🚴🚴 a lot faster than normal, as Max 🚵was leading, which was probably good – burned off all the Percy Pigs 🐷‼️…. although I have my suspicions Max secretly has me in training, we always seem to be cycling 🚴 very speedily up hills 🗻 that I never new existed 😉..

I also went to inspect London Fashion Week 💃💋- which is taking place in a car park 🚗 on Brewer Street.  I actually got a little lost, and ended up cycling past it on my bike.  It really is a slightly terrifying and quite strange affair – do go have a look 👀. There are just endless loiterers outside the entrance, some dressed in mad outfits 👸, I suppose hoping to be photographed 📷, others with cameras 🎥 hoping to photograph 📷, and others in wacky outfits 👼with cameras 📷.  It seems like everyone is waiting for something, but no one is quite sure what, and now and then a photographer 🎥 will decide that a girl peacocking 💃 in a fairly vile outfit is the next big thing in street style and there is a ripple, and with furtive looks 😒 other people start snapping 📷📷💫 away.  It is really quite a tense atmosphere, and I am pretty sure some of those people were there all day, just loitering, and watching and being watched 👯.  I am tempted to go back in a super outrageous outfit 👑, but I think really, it’s all about actually going into a show 💃📷- only then do you have any real status, regardless of what you are wearing, be it a bin bag, or a pair of gap jeans…  I do love it though.  There is so much ridiculousness taking place in and around Soho, which the rest of London is completely oblivious too.

The last trip I took this weekend was to see the greyhounds race in Wimbledon 🐺🐎 – this was really fascinating – seriously go before they knock it down in the summer and build flats over it (I think it is the only greyhound racing track left in London?).  The people are absolutely fantastic 👨👨 – there are some very serious tweed coats, flat caps, other caps and well nurtured moustaches – there was even a small child dressed in a full tweed suit and flat cap – and I am pretty sure they are there every weekend, cheering on their favourites.  What I like the most is that everyone is just having a jolly good time 🍻.  The dogs 🐺🐺have fun names like Pennys Suzie and Fizzy Pop Oscar – and before each race they switch the lights off 🎇, so you know it’s about to begin.  The place is not glamorous (the track is pretty shabby) but it is quite something.  I have to say, I’m not sure I really like the idea of making the dogs run 🐎 that fast for entertainment, as they can damage themselves….. but I would go again for the people watching 👨👌.

So after my greyhound 🐺animal cruelty thoughts, I allowed Bumble 🐰 to roam free this afternoon, and I lost concentration for maybe 10 minutes – and he savagely chewed through the internet wire AGAIN ❌❌‼️⁉️ – so I have relocated to the pub 💻🍷 to steal their internet (thanks guys).

I have got over my irks and am feeling much better about this week – I really would however, still quite like that dress 😉…

Alice xxx

The dress – too cruel TK Maxx
LFW – voyeurs
Dog racing – tweed caps and a very bald head
Placed a bet on a dog
Recovery after a long weekend – dreaming of chasing bunnies


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